I have finally made the decision that it's time to retire this blog. It's been a long time in coming. I'm in a different place in my life now. For several months now, I have been very introspective. I've been discerning where I am, where I've been and what is next for me. I think I may have finally come to the place where I realize that the destination is not half as important as the journey!
Feel free to come back and visit Be Not Afraid any time you'd like. I have no plans to delete the blog...at least until I've had time to print it out...for my kids.
I have started a new journey...one that will be much more personal. I have no idea what direction I'll go with it. If you'd like to follow along, I'd love to have you.
Please visit me at "Finding My Joy in the Journey".
Thursday, August 14, 2014
Monday, May 19, 2014
It has been forever since I've blogged here! I am still alive. Much has happened in the almost 8 months since I've been to this place. I'm feeling the need to put my thoughts and feelings to paper again. I've missed you all.
Thursday, September 26, 2013
The Idea Room Photo-a-Day Challenge, September 2013, Days 13 and 14
Day 13 - a friend (September 13th)
Well, this was not a helpful prompt. I could go several different ways on this, but I've decided to stick with what my first inclination was.....and that was to talk about my friend Kathy. She and I have been friends for so long...that I honestly don't remember back before we knew each other. We have been friends though thick and thin....good times and bad. I suppose that we have gone through almost every situation that friends can go through. I never tell her enough how much she means to me...and how much I appreciate her. We are both so busy that we barely have a few short minutes once or twice a month to touch base. But...it doesn't matter. We pick up right where we left off the last time. We can't be separated by time and space (she lives in CA and I live in FL)...there is NOTHING on this earth that will keep us from being friends.
A couple of years ago, she came to Florida for a visit. We spent lots of time together! She loves my kids...and they love their Aunt Kathy! I don't know what I would ever do without her! I love you, Kathy! You mean the world to me!
Day 14 - I wish for...... (September 14th)
Today, I wish for a cure for cancer. I wish that there was never a need for this dumb pink ribbon. I wish that women didn't have to lose a part of their body...a part of who they are and what makes them a woman. I wish that I didn't have to mourn the loss of so many of my friends whose lives have been taken by this horrid disease. I wish I didn't have to mourn the loss of one of them now...someone who is taking her last breaths as I type this. She has 5 children (her youngest is 3) and a devoted husband. Her cancer spread to other parts of her body, slowly stealing her life. She fought valiantly. Oh God, if we could just take a step back. If she could have caught it sooner....if they could have tried a different chemo....anything....ANYTHING to change this outcome.
If I were honest, I would tell you that sometimes, I suffer from "survivor's guilt". Why her? Why is she dying? Why have I done so well?
Just for today, I wish that cancer didn't exist....that we didn't experience so much loss....that children wouldn't have to lose their mothers.
"For the sake of His sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world"
Well, this was not a helpful prompt. I could go several different ways on this, but I've decided to stick with what my first inclination was.....and that was to talk about my friend Kathy. She and I have been friends for so long...that I honestly don't remember back before we knew each other. We have been friends though thick and thin....good times and bad. I suppose that we have gone through almost every situation that friends can go through. I never tell her enough how much she means to me...and how much I appreciate her. We are both so busy that we barely have a few short minutes once or twice a month to touch base. But...it doesn't matter. We pick up right where we left off the last time. We can't be separated by time and space (she lives in CA and I live in FL)...there is NOTHING on this earth that will keep us from being friends.
A couple of years ago, she came to Florida for a visit. We spent lots of time together! She loves my kids...and they love their Aunt Kathy! I don't know what I would ever do without her! I love you, Kathy! You mean the world to me!
Day 14 - I wish for...... (September 14th)
Today, I wish for a cure for cancer. I wish that there was never a need for this dumb pink ribbon. I wish that women didn't have to lose a part of their body...a part of who they are and what makes them a woman. I wish that I didn't have to mourn the loss of so many of my friends whose lives have been taken by this horrid disease. I wish I didn't have to mourn the loss of one of them now...someone who is taking her last breaths as I type this. She has 5 children (her youngest is 3) and a devoted husband. Her cancer spread to other parts of her body, slowly stealing her life. She fought valiantly. Oh God, if we could just take a step back. If she could have caught it sooner....if they could have tried a different chemo....anything....ANYTHING to change this outcome.
If I were honest, I would tell you that sometimes, I suffer from "survivor's guilt". Why her? Why is she dying? Why have I done so well?
Just for today, I wish that cancer didn't exist....that we didn't experience so much loss....that children wouldn't have to lose their mothers.
"For the sake of His sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world"
Wednesday, September 25, 2013
The Idea Room Photo-a-Day Challenge, September 2013, Days 11 and 12
Day 11 - in the distance (September 11)
This is always such a weird day for me. It's funny that even 12 years later, the emotion is still raw. I was not in New York on the day the Twin Towers came down. I do not know anyone that was killed, injured or escaped that day. Still, in the pit of my stomach, I feel pain when I see images. I think all of us suffer a little PTSD from 9/11/01, don't you?
When you are in the midst of tragedy, it's hard to see anything but what is right in front of you. But, I'm here to tell you that if you can look beyond the evil of it all, there....in the distance, is Hope.
Day 12 - New (September 12th)
A new school year for all three of my darlings.....
They are growing so fast! I wish we could slow down time, just for a bit.
This is always such a weird day for me. It's funny that even 12 years later, the emotion is still raw. I was not in New York on the day the Twin Towers came down. I do not know anyone that was killed, injured or escaped that day. Still, in the pit of my stomach, I feel pain when I see images. I think all of us suffer a little PTSD from 9/11/01, don't you?
When you are in the midst of tragedy, it's hard to see anything but what is right in front of you. But, I'm here to tell you that if you can look beyond the evil of it all, there....in the distance, is Hope.
Image Credit |
Day 12 - New (September 12th)
A new school year for all three of my darlings.....
Nathan - 7th Grade |
Amelia - 3rd Grade Olivia - 2nd Grade |
Tuesday, September 24, 2013
The Idea Room Photo-a-Day Challenge, September 2013, Days 9 and 10
Day 9 - A Sport (September 9th)
Olivia wanted to play soccer again this year. She was very upset when I had to explain to her that Mommy had missed the deadline for sign ups! I feel awful. However, with me having to travel so far from our normal routine just to pick Amelia up from school, I think it's best that for now...we don't have anything throwing a wrench into our schedules. So, in honor of my little Olivia...here is a soccer picture from Kindergarten!
Day 10 - Starts with "B" (September 10th)
Birthday! Yep! My oldest turned 13 today! I can hardly believe that I have a teenager! This is HUGE! In honor of my first born...
Olivia wanted to play soccer again this year. She was very upset when I had to explain to her that Mommy had missed the deadline for sign ups! I feel awful. However, with me having to travel so far from our normal routine just to pick Amelia up from school, I think it's best that for now...we don't have anything throwing a wrench into our schedules. So, in honor of my little Olivia...here is a soccer picture from Kindergarten!
Assumption Soccer League |
Birthday! Yep! My oldest turned 13 today! I can hardly believe that I have a teenager! This is HUGE! In honor of my first born...
September 2000 |
Monday, September 23, 2013
The Idea Room Photo-a-Day Challenge, September 2013, Day 7 and 8
Day - 7 A Pathway (September 7th)
Our home is 60 years old. It's been around a long time. Some parts of it are falling apart. Still, it's our home. I have found lots of quirky things in this old house. Things like an old intercom system that hasn't worked in eons and a very strange lay out of living room walls and doorways. But one of the strangest things I've always wondered about is thewalkway pathway leading from our front door!
If you come straight out our front door, this cement pathway leads to....well, nothing. If you come out the front door and turn immediately to your right (you can see this in the picture), you can take anotherwalkway pathway to the driveway. But, this one makes no sense to me...at all. It just STOPS! It reminds me of a line of traveling ants. They walk along, following each other and never veering off of their path. However, if you put a stick in front of them, or somehow interrupt the line....they get all crazy and don't know where to go. I used to do that as a kid because I thought it was funny. As an adult, I now think that is cruel.
Some paths don't lead to where we think they will. Sometimes, we don't know until it's too late that we've chosen the wrong one. If you can, try to see beyond the path. Try and anticipate where it might lead. Don't always rely on what you can see. There are surprises along the way. Embrace them!
When I saw the prompt for this day...bright...I immediately thought of a photo I took when arriving to work one day a few weeks ago. It was early in the morning and there was one lone thunderstorm to the west of the city. With the rising sun in the east shining on it....the clouds were whiter than white! It made me think of the magnificence of heaven! It must be shining bright with the light of God's Love! Don't you think?
Our home is 60 years old. It's been around a long time. Some parts of it are falling apart. Still, it's our home. I have found lots of quirky things in this old house. Things like an old intercom system that hasn't worked in eons and a very strange lay out of living room walls and doorways. But one of the strangest things I've always wondered about is the
If you come straight out our front door, this cement pathway leads to....well, nothing. If you come out the front door and turn immediately to your right (you can see this in the picture), you can take another
Some paths don't lead to where we think they will. Sometimes, we don't know until it's too late that we've chosen the wrong one. If you can, try to see beyond the path. Try and anticipate where it might lead. Don't always rely on what you can see. There are surprises along the way. Embrace them!
Day - 8 Bright (September 8th)When I saw the prompt for this day...bright...I immediately thought of a photo I took when arriving to work one day a few weeks ago. It was early in the morning and there was one lone thunderstorm to the west of the city. With the rising sun in the east shining on it....the clouds were whiter than white! It made me think of the magnificence of heaven! It must be shining bright with the light of God's Love! Don't you think?
Sunday, September 22, 2013
The Idea Room Photo-a-Day Challenge, September 2013, Day 5 and 6.
Day - 5 Empty (September 5th)
When I hear the word "empty", I always feel sad. Either my gas tank is empty, the milk carton is empty, or my store of energy is empty! No matter what is "empty", it usually means something is lacking or not up to par. And today, instead of "my cup runneth over"....my cup was EMPTY! Trust me....this is NEVER a good thing!
Day 6 - A Circle (September 6th)
Today, when thinking of a circle, all I could imagine was the round, white, perfect Host held up during mass. I am 48 years old and I have been a Catholic my entire life and the mystery of Transubstantiation remains just that....a mystery. I no more understand it now than I did as a child. As I was contemplating this during mass, I was struck by the Gospel passage for today from Luke...."You can not serve two masters". Gazing at that round, perfect Host....how can I even consider serving two masters. I have lots of work to do this week....on me! I need to get rid of any other master that I worship. I need to remind myself about where my loyalties are and who it is that I live for. Pray for me. I'll pray for you, too! (Admittedly, I did not take the photo below, but you get the idea).
P.S. I'm going to get caught up on this photo challenge! I promise!
When I hear the word "empty", I always feel sad. Either my gas tank is empty, the milk carton is empty, or my store of energy is empty! No matter what is "empty", it usually means something is lacking or not up to par. And today, instead of "my cup runneth over"....my cup was EMPTY! Trust me....this is NEVER a good thing!
Day 6 - A Circle (September 6th)
Today, when thinking of a circle, all I could imagine was the round, white, perfect Host held up during mass. I am 48 years old and I have been a Catholic my entire life and the mystery of Transubstantiation remains just that....a mystery. I no more understand it now than I did as a child. As I was contemplating this during mass, I was struck by the Gospel passage for today from Luke...."You can not serve two masters". Gazing at that round, perfect Host....how can I even consider serving two masters. I have lots of work to do this week....on me! I need to get rid of any other master that I worship. I need to remind myself about where my loyalties are and who it is that I live for. Pray for me. I'll pray for you, too! (Admittedly, I did not take the photo below, but you get the idea).
P.S. I'm going to get caught up on this photo challenge! I promise!
Friday, September 20, 2013
Computer Problems
Hi Everybody!
I'm so sorry for my absence! My computer is dying a very slow death. At one point, I thought it was over, but my husband revived it! And so, here we are.
I will begin my catch up with the Photo Challenge tomorrow. I'll do a couple a day until I'm caught up! Thanks for your patience!
I'm so sorry for my absence! My computer is dying a very slow death. At one point, I thought it was over, but my husband revived it! And so, here we are.
I will begin my catch up with the Photo Challenge tomorrow. I'll do a couple a day until I'm caught up! Thanks for your patience!
Wednesday, September 4, 2013
The Idea Room Photo-a-Day Challenge, September 2013, Day 4
Day 4 - Exercise (September 4)
Today's prompt is actually an "exercise" in humility for me. After fussing with Olivia most of the afternoon yesterday....and after having to send her to bed early because of her behavior....she left this picture for me to see as soon as I got up!
How is it that our children have a knack for making us feel like dirt sometimes?
If you'd like to take part in this photo challenge, check out The Idea Room!
Today's prompt is actually an "exercise" in humility for me. After fussing with Olivia most of the afternoon yesterday....and after having to send her to bed early because of her behavior....she left this picture for me to see as soon as I got up!
How is it that our children have a knack for making us feel like dirt sometimes?
If you'd like to take part in this photo challenge, check out The Idea Room!
Tuesday, September 3, 2013
The Idea Room Photo-a-Day Challenge, September 2013, Day 3
Day 3 - Up (September 3rd)
When I saw today's prompt, I immediately thought of two things. First, I thought of "growing up"...as in...my kids and how fast that process is going. Then, I thought of this Hot Air Balloon Festival that we went to just after Amelia was born. We had such a good time that day! It was glorious to look "up" in the sky on this beautiful early morning to see such color!
That's Nathan and I in the bottom right corner. Amelia was in the stroller and my little Livy...well, she wasn't even here yet! Nathan was only 4 years old and Amelia was just 3 months!
It's great fun to go back and look at old photos! They can bring back wonderful memories for me! It seems like almost a lifetime ago! After 3 days into it...I'm really enjoying this photo challenge!
May 2004 - Jacksonville, Florida |
When I saw today's prompt, I immediately thought of two things. First, I thought of "growing up"...as in...my kids and how fast that process is going. Then, I thought of this Hot Air Balloon Festival that we went to just after Amelia was born. We had such a good time that day! It was glorious to look "up" in the sky on this beautiful early morning to see such color!
That's Nathan and I in the bottom right corner. Amelia was in the stroller and my little Livy...well, she wasn't even here yet! Nathan was only 4 years old and Amelia was just 3 months!
It's great fun to go back and look at old photos! They can bring back wonderful memories for me! It seems like almost a lifetime ago! After 3 days into it...I'm really enjoying this photo challenge!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)