Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Can we talk for a minute?

I'm sorry that it's been a few weeks since I've posted anything.  We've been extremely busy with family functions and illness.  Most recently, all of us (except Dan) came down with influenza "B"!  I can sum up the last 6 days in one word:  TORTURE!  Fevers, coughs, vomiting, runny noses and sleepless nights....that's what my week consisted of!  However, that's not what I wanted to whine talk with you about.

Today, my 2012 Catholic Heritage Curricula catalog came in the mail!  Dan had come home earlier in the day, so it was sitting on the kitchen counter....staring at me!  I avoided it for the first several minutes, hoping that one of the other pieces of mail would capture my attention.  There was nothing but ads and a magazine renewal.

Last year, when the catalog came, I threw it away without even looking at it.  The fact that we were NOT going to homeschool again was too new, to raw.  I just needed to focus on preparing for regular school again, keeping my focus on all of our blessings.  God had answered a very special prayer request for me...to be able to homeschool my kids for at least one year.  As disappointed as I was that we were not going to continue, I had to keep looking forward and LET IT GO!  We truly enjoyed our year at home.  It was special and I realized that I could do it, that I could be both mother and teacher to my kids!  I survived.  They survived.

This past school year was rough though.  Fifth grade was brutal!  Nathan started off doing really well and then suffered some set backs with math in the 3rd quarter.  He was able to make a positive turn toward the end, but not without some bumps and bruises.  Amelia ended up with a second grade teacher that was very anti homeschooling!  She let it be known to me several times that Amelia's reading problems this year were due to her year at home.  Amelia did not fit into the typical second grade "box" that they want everyone to fit into.  She is more of a free spirit.  Had we continued to homeschool, I would not have worried one bit about her reading level.  She would be free to move along at her own pace instead of being forced into remedial classes and countless days of "she just doesn't measure up" attitudes.  Her confidence level took a huge nose dive.  She asked me on more than one occasion, "Mom, am I dumb?"  She even asked me if she had "ADHD"!  Now, tell me, how would a second grader know what ADHD meant, unless perhaps she heard an angry, anti homeschooling teacher mention it?  They promoted her to the third grade but strongly suggested summer school!  This really left a bad taste in my mouth.

So today, when the catalog came in the mail...I opened it!  I savored it!  I read every page, of every grade!  My mouth watered at all the new material that CHC is adding to their curriculum (I just love the Battle Planner!).  I looked at all the materials from last year, and sighed (heavily) over all the things we missed.  I said a quick prayer for all of the families that will use CHC this year, for all the families that will begin their homeschooling journey, and for all that will end theirs.  I said a prayer for my family, for this upcoming school year...for their teachers, and I especially prayed for patience...FOR ME!  I confessed my pride (yet again), to God and asked for more humility.  I resigned myself to more pick up lines, more class parties, more parent/teacher conferences and more tuition.  Then, I thanked Him for the year at home that He gave me!  It was precious!

Thank you for coming to my pity party.  We'll meet again next year...when the catalog comes, and we can do this all over again!


4 comments:

Susan Barber said...

((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))

Judy Dudich said...

OH my heart aches.

Michelle said...

You take this with much more grace than I'd be capable of.

mary333 said...

Oh Nancy...I felt so sad reading Amelia's words. I wish people would guard their tongues around children and not try to fit them into a "box" as you say. Michaela was "monitored" by a "specialist in children's behavior" during her first year of school because she has certain traits that are common in autistic children and this raised a red flag for them. She still has these traits but is doing very well in school. When she was in pre-school Michaela had a special notebook where the teacher would comment about Michaela's day. The problem was - Michaela could read and this was hurtful to her. It wasn't even for poor behavior it was because they thought she may have Asperger's but it was still humiliating for her. They would stop me in the pick-up line and discuss things right in front of her at times. On a brighter note, one of the teachers (such a kind woman) worked one on one with Michaela and she made HUGE progress. Thank you, Lord, for those who take that "extra step" to help others.

Sorry for the long comment. I guess I wanted to say that I can relate though the circumstances are different. Speaking of "steps" my word verification is J nsteps. I thought the first part was supposed to be a number now?