Thursday, September 13, 2012

Finally, lab results!

The doctor's office called me today while I was at work.  The nurse told me that my alkaline phosphatase results were high, again.  The reference range is from 25 to 69, and mine was 81.  He wants me to have a Cat Scan of my liver.

She also told me that the doctor had already faxed over authorization for my new medication on 9/17/12.  This would have been great news, except, today is only 9/13/12.  She seemed a little miffed that I pointed this out to her.  She got flustered and said that she meant to say 9/11/12.  This means that it might be next June by the time the authorization is approved.  In the mean time, I will continue to take the Arimidex.

Someone will be calling me soon to schedule the scan.  My stomach is in knots!  I've started to eat carbs again, emotional eater that I am!  I know that worrying will not add one single day to my life, and yet, I'm worried.  As usual, I'm thinking the worst.  What if it's cancer in my liver?  I need my liver....can't live without one!  I didn't need two breasts!  Technically, I don't even need one!  However, I would really like to hang on to my liver, thank you very much!

Emotionally, I don't think I'm strong enough to go through this again.  Seriously.  It was all I could do to keep it together dealing with breast cancer.  How am I supposed to keep it together with liver cancer?  And if it isn't cancer, what is it?  Something is making those lab results all wonky.

This is my own, personal, living purgatory.

Remember, most gracious Virgin Mary, that never was it known that anyone who fled to your protection, implored your help, or sought your intercession was left unaided.  Inspired with this confidence I fly unto you dear Virgin of Virgins, my mother; to you I come, before you I stand, sinful and sorrowful.  Mother of the Word Incarnate, despise not my petitions, but in your mercy hear and answer me.  Amen.

5 comments:

Carrie said...

Praying very hard for you, Nancy.

Unknown said...

Do not fear what may happen tomorrow;

The same everlasting Father who cares for you today will take care of you today and every day.

He with either shield you from suffering or will give you unfailing strength to bear it.

Be at peace and put aside all anxious thoughts and imaginings.

St. Francis de Sales

Michelle said...

Prayers.

Mary N. said...

I'm praying, Nancy.

Barb Szyszkiewicz said...

Joining you in that Memorare!